By Bill Quain
Each summer for the past five years or so, my wife Jeanne and I have been on the hunt for the elusive “keeper” flounder. This year, a keeper must be at least 18 inches. We have tried all kinds of baits and lures. We fish in the Ocean City Bay from our boat, the “Thanks Frank.” I’d like to say that we’ve had our ups and downs, but that might lead you to believe that we’ve been eating flounder on a regular basis. But most of the flounder we did eat came from the seafood counter at the Acme! This year, we’ve had zero keeper flounders.
And trying to catch flounder isn’t the only place we’ve failed out there on the bay.
Despite our best efforts and our constant vigilance, we have not been able to rid the Ocean City Bay of a terrible scourge – a pirate boat that brazenly sails back and forth, recruiting and training a new band of pirates three times per day! We warn them, shout at them, and even threaten them with swords, but they are relentless.
Captain Bridgette, Queen of the Pirates
We know where the pirate ship is docked and who the leader is. The boat sails from a place called “Pirate Voyages” near 2nd Street and Bay Avenue in Ocean City. That’s right, Ocean City!
Yes, we’ve had trouble with people who can’t park cars correctly and who try to sneak onto the beach without wearing a beach tag, but whoever expected we’d have a resident gang of bay-going pirates!
Bridgette is the captivating captain of the gang. She shakes her fist at us and gets the other pirates to do the same every time we try to get them to leave the bay.
We can’t remember how it started.
Jeanne and I can’t remember exactly how this started, but several years ago, on a (not-so-successful) flounder-fishing trip, we decided we would have some fun with the pirate ship the next time we went out. To prepare ourselves for battle, we went to our favorite pirate-fighting equipment shop on Asbury Avenue (Hoy’s Variety store) and bought some plastic pirate cutlasses. Next, we found a conch shell that we use as a horn, and later, we even purchased an admiral’s hat on Amazon. Thus prepared, we looked for those pirates the next time we were flounder fishing. We didn’t know how they would take our enthusiastic efforts to get rid of them, but it has become a bit of tradition, and both the crew and the passengers seem to enjoy it. But truth be told, I think we have the most fun of all!
We cruise up alongside the pirate boat (not too close, because they are armed with water cannons). After blowing the conch shell to get everyone’s attention, we wave our plastic swords and shout, “Go home pirates! No pirates in Ocean City! Go back to Margate!” We just assume that Margate would be a more natural fit for pirates. But again, we’re new at this, so if any of my readers have a different theory, please let me know.
So far it hasn’t worked, but we won’t stop trying. By the way, we’ve never actually met Captain Bridgette face to face – only from the port side of our boat. We have exchanged some pictures by texting. Maybe we’ll eventually have the chance to sit down with her and have a beer – just to make the peace.
I guess these are good enough pirates to keep around. Besides, the whole thing is a lot of fun! It’s a tradition we intend to keep!
Building traditions always builds great memories.
The Quain family was always looking for new traditions. Although I guess “new traditions” is a little like “jumbo shrimp”: words that don’t seem to go together – much like the words “keeper flounder”!
Of course, we have stuck with many of our old traditions as well. For example, I am the oldest of seven children. For many years, we would all come together for a two-week vacation here in Ocean City. We traveled from near and far. On that first Saturday night, we would gather with all of our kids at my parent’s house. All we wanted to have for dinner that night was take-out platters from Campbell’s restaurant. But for some reason, my mother insisted on cooking a turkey dinner.
It became a standing joke and a tradition we kept up until she passed away. And, sorry Mom, the next year, even though we all felt guilty, we had take-out seafood. As I write this, all I can think is, “I wish our family was still eating that turkey from Mom.”
Do you have any crazy traditions?
How about you? Have you developed any zany traditions at the Jersey shore – or maybe even somewhere else? Do you chase pirates, or have any crazy rituals before an Eagles or Phillies game? We’d love to hear about it. Shoot me an email with the details.
As I say each week, I’ll see ya in the papers!
Bill is a Professor in Stockton University’s Hospitality Management Program. He is the author of 27 books, and a highly-respected speaker. Even though he is almost totally blind, Bill is a long-distance runner and runs the Ocean City Half Marathon each year. He lives in Ocean City with his wife Jeanne, and his Guide Dog Trudy. Visit www.billquain.com or email him at bill@quain.com.
