Navigating Thanksgiving conversations: Five topics to avoid and what to talk about instead

By Sarah Fertsch

Thanksgiving is a time for family, friends and cherished traditions, whether it’s tossing the football before the turkey’s ready, watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade or cheering on a favorite pup at the National Dog Show. However, one tradition everyone hopes to skip is the infamous family argument.

When loved ones gather, their varied opinions often follow, sometimes sparking lively debates—or worse, heated exchanges. While some enjoy diving into discussions about politics or pop culture, Thanksgiving is a day best reserved for fostering connection and gratitude. Steering clear of sensitive or divisive topics can keep the mood light and the gathering enjoyable for everyone.

Here are five conversation pitfalls to avoid this Thanksgiving, along with positive alternatives to keep the dialogue inclusive and uplifting.

  1. Politics

Avoid: “Who did you vote for?”

Try instead: “What’s something you’re excited about for the future?”

With elections often on people’s minds, political talk might seem inevitable, but these discussions can quickly turn contentious, creating tension at the table.

Rather than diving into debates, shift the focus to personal goals, future aspirations, or even exciting advancements in technology or the environment. This sparks inspiring and engaging conversations without the risk of dividing the room.

  1. Religion

Avoid: “Why didn’t I see you in church last week?”

Try instead: “What traditions make this holiday special to you?”

Although Thanksgiving isn’t inherently a religious holiday, everyone has different views on spirituality and traditions that make life meaningful. If everyone shares the same beliefs, you could give a blessing over the meal, but if there’s dissent, perhaps say a prayer silently.

We encourage you to celebrate traditions in a way that everyone can join in. Asking about favorite customs—whether holiday-related or cultural—opens up space for meaningful sharing without stepping into sensitive territory.

  1. Money and finances

Avoid: “Do you think we are entering a recession?”

Try instead: “What’s something you’ve accomplished or learned recently?”

Conversations about salaries, financial challenges or job changes can make people uncomfortable or self-conscious, even unintentionally.

Instead of focusing on money matters, turn the discussion to personal achievements, new skills or hobbies. This keeps the tone upbeat and helps everyone share something they’re proud of.

  1. Food choices, diets and weight

Avoid: “Do you really need another helping?”

Try instead: “What’s your favorite dish on the table?”

Food is a centerpiece of Thanksgiving, but commenting on someone’s eating habits, weight or health can be hurtful, even if unintended.

Celebrate the joy of the meal by asking about favorite dishes or the stories behind cherished recipes. This keeps the focus on the culinary experience and brings back fond memories for everyone.

  1. Parenting and family planning

Avoid: “When are you two having kids?” or “Why do you let your kids do that?”

Try instead: “What’s the funniest story from your childhood or your parenting adventures?”

Parenting and family planning are deeply personal topics, and unsolicited opinions or questions can put people on edge. Whether it’s advice on raising children or speculation about starting a family, these discussions are best avoided.

Instead, turn the conversation toward lighthearted anecdotes. Share funny or heartwarming parenting stories, or invite others to recall amusing childhood memories.

By choosing positive and inclusive topics, you can create an atmosphere where everyone feels valued and welcome. Thanksgiving is about coming together, celebrating gratitude and embracing the uniqueness of our loved ones. So this year, focus on what connects us and enjoy a holiday full of warmth, laughter and love.

Facebook
Twitter
LinkedIn
Pinterest