’Twas the week before Christmas, and all through our town. We’re racing through errands and running around. The lists keep on growing, the days feel too tight, and even our “free time” is booked every night.
There’s last-minute shopping, cards to still send, baking and wrapping — is there no end? The roads are so busy, our patience wears thin. Still, we push through the pressure with a determined grin.
Sound familiar? We just need a few simple strategies that lower stress in real time, help us shop smarter, and keep family gatherings from draining every ounce of energy.
Between money worries, family dynamics, travel hiccups, grief that can surface out of nowhere, and the pressure to make everything feel magical, our bodies and minds can get overloaded fast. The good news is that stress is not a character flaw; it’s a signal. When we listen to it, we can make small shifts that protect our energy and help the holidays feel meaningful, not miserable.
One of the biggest stress triggers is the belief that everything has to be perfect — perfect tree, perfect meal, perfect gifts, perfect family photo. Meanwhile, real life is happening. Our schedule is full, our budget has limits, and our body still needs sleep. Reframe everything for warm and memorable, not flawless. Most people do not remember whether the ribbon matched the napkins; they remember how they felt in the room. Calm is contagious, and so is kindness. I remind myself every year that the goal is to be connected, not perfect.
A practical way to lower stress quickly is to decide what matters most before the week runs you into the ground. Pick three holiday priorities and let them guide your choices. Maybe it’s time with the people you love, keeping a favorite tradition, and taking care of your health. When something new pops up — another party, another bake sale, another gift exchange — ask yourself, does this fit your three? If it doesn’t, you are allowed to pass. “I’d love to, but I can’t this week,” is a complete sentence. Saying no to one thing often means saying yes to your peace.
Instead of carrying around a to-do list in your head, get it out of your brain and onto paper, then shrink it. Try making two lists: must do and nice to do. Must do is short, realistic and time-bound. Nice to do is optional — the stuff you can let slide, simplify or save for after the holiday. This is where you give yourself permission to buy the cookies, send the digital card, wrap with gift bags, or serve a simple dinner. Convenience is not cheating; it’s coping.
Money is another major stressor, and financial pressure can quietly steal joy. A simple budget boundary can reduce anxiety almost immediately. Choose a total spending number you can truly live with, then divide it into categories — gifts, food, travel and giving. If you are already feeling the squeeze, shift to thoughtful and low-cost options: a handwritten note, a framed photo, a batch of homemade muffins, a helpful errand, or a promise of time together in January. The meaning is in the thought, not the price tag. If gift-giving has gotten out of control, suggest a name draw, a kids-only exchange or a spending cap. Most families are relieved when someone says it out loud.
Now let’s talk about gatherings. Sometimes they’re wonderful, sometimes they’re complicated, and sometimes they are both. Before the event, plan a few pressure-release valves. Drive your own car if you can, set a time limit, schedule a short break outside, or bring a supportive friend. If certain topics always turn tense — politics, money, parenting — practice a redirect line in advance: “Let’s save that for another day. Tell me what you’ve been watching lately.” You can also give yourself permission to be the observer, not the referee. You do not have to fix every mood in the room.
Grief can hit hard during the holidays, even if we think we are doing OK. I find myself missing my mom when I hear a song she loved, see a picture of her, or think about a moment we shared. If someone you love is missing, the season can stir up sadness. You may be smiling one minute, then tearing up the next. That is normal. One small way to make space for grief is to include it in the holiday instead of trying to outrun it. Light a candle, hang an ornament, make their favorite recipe, share a story, or donate in their name. Love does not end; it changes shape, and we carry it differently this time of year. My husband and I laugh about funny moments we had with the people who are no longer here — his parents, my mom, even some friends — and it feels like they are still with us in some way.
Also, let’s not forget self-care. Our body keeps the score during hectic weeks, and it usually asks for the basics: sleep, movement, hydration and a little quiet time. We do not need a perfect workout plan right now; we need some movement. Ten minutes of stretching, a brisk walk, a few squats while the coffee brews, or a dance break in the kitchen. Add one simple reset each day — a glass of water before your first cup of coffee, a real lunch, lights out 30 minutes earlier, or a short breathing break in the car before going inside. Tiny routines tell our brain that we are OK.
Let’s face it: food can be comfort and celebration, but stress often pushes us to extremes — either restriction all day or grazing at night. A more peaceful approach is to keep regular meals steady, then enjoy holiday favorites without going overboard. Eat protein earlier in the day, add a vegetable, drink water, and slow down enough to savor the treats. When we give ourselves permission to enjoy, we often stop at satisfied instead of stuffed. And if we do overdo it, we simply move on. Shame is not a health plan.
A fast stress reset that actually works
When stress ramps up, our bodies respond like there’s an emergency, even if the “emergency” is just a cart full of gifts and a long line. One of the quickest ways to bring the volume down is to slow our breathing. Try this anywhere, even in the car before you walk into a store or a family gathering. Inhale for four counts, hold for two, exhale for six. Do that three times. That longer exhale helps shift your body out of fight-or-flight mode.
Also, watch the basics that make stress feel worse — dehydration, skipped meals and lack of sleep. This week, even small upgrades help: a protein-based breakfast, a water bottle in the car, and a realistic bedtime. It’s not glamorous, but it’s powerful.
If the week before Christmas feels like a sprint, build in a few moments that feel like the holiday you want — not as another task, but as a joyful pause. Put on music and sit by the lights for five minutes. Watch one movie without multitasking. Step outside and breathe in the cold air. Call someone you miss. These small moments are where the season becomes real.
This week, we can still get plenty done, but we don’t have to do it all, and we don’t have to do it perfectly. When we focus on what matters most, simplify the rest, and give ourselves a little more patience and grace, we offer the people around us something better than a flawless holiday. We give them the best version of us — present, lighter and truly here.
Robin is a former television reporter for NBC News 40. She currently hosts a podcast and radio program called Living Well with Robin Stoloff. It airs Sundays at 10 AM on Lite 96.9. You can email Robin at livingwellwithrobin@gmail.com
