By Bill Quain
There are no solutions, just trade-offs.
Wow, talk about taking the pressure off! When I first read the six words above, written by the famous economist Thomas Sowell, I actually breathed a sigh of relief. Like most people, I spend a lot of my time “looking for solutions.” Once I discovered there aren’t any solutions, it made my life a lot easier! Of course, I had to deal with the fact that I am a man. Therefore, I was trained, groomed, and educated to find a solution for everyone and everything. However, once I got past that, I began to take it easy.
So, if you’ve been feeling the pressure and always trying to solve problems – for yourself and everyone else – sit back, pop open a beverage, and enjoy this edition of my column. To help you buy into the “there are no solutions” practice, I’m going to use the current situation in Ocean City to bring it home.
From backpacks to beach barriers
Last week, I wrote about the uproar that was sweeping social media concerning the ban on backpacks in Ocean City. Our mayor and city council are trying a number of different tactics to take back our beaches and boardwalks. The innovative tactics run the gamut, from the backpack ban to beach barriers, to early curfews and added police patrols. It is the backpack ban that is getting all the attention. Everyone wears backpacks, including moms carrying diapers and grandparents who need a hands-free way to carry medicines. When you think about it, backpacks are one of the most useful ways to carry stuff, like all of those necessities for a night on the boardwalk: extra jackets, water bottles, leftover pizza, snacks, etc.
Banning backpacks isn’t a good solution.
So, while the City is trying to figure out how to handle the problem, we hear things like, “Banning backpacks isn’t a good solution.” However, remember my opening statement: There are no solutions, just trade-offs. Once we all realize this, it will be a lot easier to find ways to deal with the problem.
Even kids know the “trading” rules.
When I was a kid, I learned to trade. Whether it was baseball cards or a special dessert, I was always on the lookout for a great trade. Well, trading and trade-offs have the same rules. You have to give something to get something. We are now facing a very serious problem in our beach towns, so we have to work together to find a happy medium. We have to give something up in order to take back our beaches and boardwalks. We have to deal with some pain to get some gain!
The beach and Boardwalk trade-off list
OK, you know what you want. You want a safe and quiet beach and boardwalk experience in Ocean City. Well, Mayor Jay Gillian and the City Council, along with the Ocean City Police, have come up with a few ideas, and I think they’re pretty good. Yes, it will hurt a little bit, but it will hurt a whole lot less than sheer mayhem, which is what we had for the past two summers. Mayhem also erupted on Memorial Day weekend. Here are a few things to trade:
1. Backpacks
Yeah, this can be a tough one! It isn’t bad for the people who don’t use backpacks. If you are that family with a bunch of kids down for the day, and your whole life is in that backpack, it is a big ask. That’s why we need the exemptions that have already been put in place.
2. Beach closings
OK, this is tough! The beaches are now closed at 8 p.m. Think about it: If the beaches weren’t closed at 8 p.m., you probably couldn’t go down there anyway because of the rowdy teenage crowds that had been inhabiting the beaches since the ban on police interactions with kids! Plus, Mayor Gillian just announced that the beach will be open until 10 p.m. on July 4, so you can go down and watch the fireworks.
3. An 11 p.m. curfew for those under 18
OK, for me, this is a no-pain-trade-off. I’m 70. No one is going to ask for my ID. However, if you are in that age group that is always being “carded,” this might be a bit of a nuisance. As my favorite nun, Sister Mary Nicotine of the Holy Smokes, used to say, “Offer it up for the poor souls in Purgatory,” and just take one for the team! We all appreciate it.
I’ll trade you. What ya got?
How about you? Want to trade six-word stories? Shoot me an email with your “trade-off” thoughts. Don’t worry about keeping them to six words. I’ll edit them and share them in this column. Just write to bill@quain.com and put “Six words on a Boardwalk bench” in the subject line. As I say each week, I’ll see ya in the papers!
Bill is a Professor in Stockton University’s Hospitality Management Program. He is the author of 27 books, and a highly-respected speaker. Even though he is almost totally blind, Bill is a long-distance runner and runs the Ocean City Half Marathon each year. He lives in Ocean City with his wife Jeanne, and his Guide Dog Trudy. Visit www.billquain.com or email him at bill@quain.com.
