By Matt Bridgestone
One of the most popular comments a comedian will hear is “what you do takes balls.” People say this to us to imply that speaking in front of a crowd of strangers requires a certain level of bravery and self-confidence. The truth is that most comedians are extremely insecure. It is a business that is infested with nervousness and anxiety. What comes off as brave is usually more like mental illness. It is amazing when you see someone have an impressive set on stage, and then find them throwing up afterwards while saying that they cannot remember anything that just happened. Part of the problem is that the best comedy seems to stem from sadness. It is a coping mechanism that often uproots moments that were painful at the time.
Richard Pryor is generally regarded as one of, if not, the greatest standup comedians of all time. A big part of that is he brings us into a world that is extremely uncomfortable. He shares stories about growing up in a whore house, his heart attack, lighting himself on fire, and his dealings with the mafia. In the moment he was having these life experiences he must have been filled with a wide range of negative feelings, but his talent was taking that negativity and weaving it into comedy gold. Everyone handles their problems differently, but I have seen comedians have their best moments immediately following things like the death of one of their closest friends or family members. When we feel lost, it’s a place where we can go to find comfort and normalcy. Whenever I am having a difficult week, my mom will say to me “I don’t know how you can go on stage and be funny this week.” What she doesn’t understand is that I will be even sadder if I don’t. Luckily my childhood trauma is nowhere near what most comedians experience. I was raised in a loving family and given lots of support and resources. My pain was more of a slow burn of things like cousins who would give me hand-me-down clothes and then make fun of me when I wore them, or my uncle making me vacuum in front of the entire family on holidays while everyone laughed and threw more stuff on the floor as soon as I thought I was done. It seems funny to look back on that stuff, but at the time I was devastated. I think the best set I ever saw in my life was when The Reverend Bob Levy did comedy at a small dive bar on the day that his dog died. He told stories that had the crowd crying tears of emotion and laughter at the same time.
If you still think I don’t know what I am saying, then consider this. A few weeks ago, I was scheduled to be on an 8 p.m. comedy show at the Tropicana Casino. During the day I took my daughter to the last game of her little league season. They had a homerun derby for parents, and I won. Then we went to the boardwalk to go on some rides. We laughed and played and talked all day. We rode bumper cars, ate cotton candy, and won a bunch of prizes. I went to the show in such a great mood. I was buzzing about how lucky I am to have such a wonderful child who is also my best friend. That night I went on stage truly overwhelmed with joy, and proceeded to have one of the worst sets I have had in years.
You can see Matt Bridgestone and other great comics 7 days a week in Atlantic City by visiting www.acjokes.com60
